Luckiest Girl Alive
Last night I watched a movie on Netflix called “Luckiest Girl Alive” starring Mila Kunis. This movie is based on the book written by Jessica Knoll.
Due to some predictable (but vain) attempts from others to keep me quiet, I haven’t felt very inspired to write as of late.
Welp, thanks to this riveting film and my unwavering passion to help other women - I’m back.
Mila Kunis plays Ani - a successful, edgy, writer well on her way to claiming the American Dream by way of marrying into money and landing her dream job at the New York Times.
I won’t spoil the entire plot but it’s not long before Ani is confronted with a traumatic event from her past. Along her journey, she encounters a number of these characters from that time period. Some were friends, others foes, some gaslit and denounced Ani’s entire experience, while others never understood why she didn’t stand by her truth.
Throughout the film, you can tangibly see Ani’s ego-shattering as she dives deeper into the truth of what actually happened. She quickly realizes that by denying the truth of the assault she has become a compilation of who she thought everyone else would love.
What a wild concept.
Society loves to shame survivors and deter them from speaking out about their experiences because: “She just needs to move on from the past.”
When in fact, it is absolutely detrimental to not speak out. Negating, dismissing, and avoiding trauma actually contributes to unhealthy patterns of behavior, physical ailments, generational cycles, and a free pass for the perpetrator to continue offending.
It amazes me how quickly the mental health of a victim will be called into question when he/she begins talking about their trauma and their own healing process. Meanwhile, we turn our heads and actually validate abusers by silencing survivors.
October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month and the campaign theme is #Every1KnowsSome1. The idea is that everyone knows someone who has been affected by domestic violence.
Did you know that on average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States? Over the course of one year, this adds up to more than 10 million men and women experiencing domestic violence.
Furthermore, only approximately half of victims experiencing domestic violence actually report the incident.
As a society, we have set our eyes on all the wrong things. Instead of invalidating victims of domestic violence and discouraging them from speaking out - we should turn our gaze to abusers, offer them resources, and hold them accountable.
After all, we cannot change what we refuse to confront.
A wise man once said:
“Those events that once made me feel ashamed and disgraced now allow me to share with others how to become a useful member of the human race.”